To the kids going back to school now and have already been called a gay slang, I can tell you from experience that it will get better. It’s going to be rough, you will be called names, pushed, shoved and probably beat up during lunch hour or while going to your class. I know, it happened to me many times.
My first year in junior high was the worst. I was jumped one day, someone literally jumped on my back and he was at least 50lbs heavier than I was. I fell on the ground with him on top of me and he began punching the heck out of me. Because he was straddling me, I couldn’t defend myself. I was absolutely helpless. There was a crowd chanting about the fight and not one person helped me. Eventually my sister did see that I was the one getting beat up and she beat the crap out of that jerk to get him off of me, and little does she know, I praise her all the time for doing that for me.
I missed PE class one day because I had gotten kicked in a very sensitive area so hard that I was on the ground for at least 10 minutes, I even got detention for that and I was the victim. I had to look over my shoulder and I would pray everyday that I would make it home.
I tried to commit suicide many times that year because I couldn’t take it anymore. I was called so many names, like faggot, queer, geek and nerd. I honestly don’t know what I did to deserve that treatment, but I took it for 2 years until we left Reseda and moved to Simi Valley where things did get better.
School is such a small part of your life and once you graduate, you will find that as an adult people are more accepting. Not that you need anyone’s approval mind you, but it is still nice to have people accept you for who you are, not who you are attracted to. Life is so much more and your adulthood is waiting for you, so it may seem too difficult to take the abuse and you may be sick and tired of being sick and tired, but trust me, I know from experience. It WILL get better!
Just hang in there kiddo, the future needs you. Your family needs you. Your future husband or wife needs you. Heck, if you are lucky, your future children and grandchildren need you. Without you, we wouldn’t have lawyers, judges and politicians to change laws for the better. Without you, we may never have a gay president. Yes, I said it! What if you were our future president? This country needs you to hang in there because it will get better.
I am pleading with anyone who will listen, whether it is a gay person, a mother, father, brother, sister, aunt, uncle, cousin, grandparent or friend. Protect your family and let them know that you are on their side. I am so sick of seeing on the news that another child has committed suicide because they were bullied. Not just LGBT children, straight children as well. I’m sick of it. My heart breaks with every death. So please, just go to that person who is being bullied in school and tell him or her that you are on their side, because that can make all the difference in the world. They need to hear that someone is on their side and that you will always be there for them.
I am always on Facebook, so if you need someone to talk with, don’t be a stranger. Send me a direct message, or tweet with me @DiaryofaGayNerd. I will be a shoulder that you can cry on, but please hang in there. School will be over in the blink of an eye, it won’t last forever. You can do it, I believe in you!
Diary of a Gay Nerd 